Hey guys, I've got a bit of a different post topic for you today. This is a post to give you some tips, from my personal experience, on how to be in a sucessful long distance relationship.
So at the beginning of this year I entered into my first ever long distance relationship. This was something new to me and I was a little anxious on how I was going to cope with being away from my other half for long amounts of time. So I've got for you, and insight to my long distance relationship and how me and my boyfriend have dealt with it.
My boyfriend is at university in Derby, and I'm working full time here in Suffolk. Therefore were a grand total of 2 and a half hours away from eachother. Our realtionship is perfect (despite the distance) and here is how we get through it.
My boyfriend and I have a rule. Each time we see meet up, whether it's for 2 days or 2 weeks, we have to know exactly when we are going to see each other next by the time we go back to our own towns. For example when I last left him a few weeks ago I knew I was going to be seeing him this Saturday. Therefore we were able to count down the days as we went. Only 3 days left!! You have no idea how much easier this will make your time apart. I have found that counting down the time until you see each other again day by day makes things so much easier. You can then always know exactly how many days it is until you see each other again. Also it's quite enjoyable seeing the number decrease each day.
Call Every Night
Another rule we have. We call eachother every single night that we aren't with each other. This really helps me because hearing my other halfs voice everyday literally makes my entire day. It also helps you to realise that they are still there on the other side of the phone. Having a mobile or Skype call each day really helps and I would advise you to make that one of your rules as well. My boyfriendand I made those rules just before we were about to be away from each other the first time for about a month and it was the best thing we could have done.
Make The Most Of Time
It already sucks that you won't get to see your other half as often as you want to or as often as other couples do, so don't make it worse by using the time you do have together to mope around and think about being apart again. Make the most of the time you do have together, dont worry about what's going to happen later on, just enjoy your time together no matter how short it is. You could always do what I do, I made another rule that we are not allowed to talk about the distance while we're with eachother. That way we are just left to enjoy our time together and love the fact that we're together. The more you worry about it the worse it is.
Talk About The Future
I don't mean plan your wedding and how many kids you're going to have, I mean talk about what's going to happen when the distance doesn't matter anymore. If your situation is similar to mine then you are just waiting for either yourself or your partner to finish college or university. It's a good idea to talk about what you are going to do when that time comes. Then you actually feel like you have something to work towards, rather than just being in a long distance relationship and having no idea what your future together is like.
It's also a good idea to make plans in advance for what you're going to do when you do see eachother, then you don't have to waste time thinking of things to do together. Perhaps make a list of everything you want to do and then you can just choose something off it on the day. My boyfriend and I have an app on our phones where we make mini bucket lists of things we'd like to do wheh we next go to London, that way we don't forget and miss out on things. It's a good way of making the most of your time together when you do have it.
Talk To Eachother
You might think this one is obvious but I don't mean just general chat, I mean tell eachother everything. Tell eachother when you're feeling really happy, when you're feeling sad, when you're tired. Tell them everything. This way if you are feeling tired then your partner already knows that, so if you don't answer then they know you have fallen asleep!! Also then they know that you might be a little moody from over tiredness. This is a really good way of preventing arguments. It's also good to have someone to talk to about how you are feeling, it's amazing how much better you will feel. You're in the long distance relationship together so who better to talk to than your boyfriend/girlfriend.
I also find it a comfort to tell my partner how well we are doing. Meaning just have a chat about how well you are coping with the distance. This will make you feel better as well.
There you go, that's my advice on how to deal with a long distance relationship, as I said this is my first ever one and I'm just sharing with you some tips I've found that really do help.
One more thing that I use a lot is that when I really miss my partner I ask myself, would I prefer to have the distance between us or not have him at all? And I'd choose the distance everytime. Next time you feel a little down because of missing someone you love then ask yourself that question, if your answer is the same as mine then you know how well you're doing.
Hope these tips help you as much as they help Me and Kai. Do you have any other tips to add? Let me know.